What do you call A man who's been buried in A bog for 4000 years?
What do you call a dinosaur with a banana in each ear?
Nothing, he can't hear you!
When is a bird not a bird?
When it has nothing to do, it's A bored!
Why do birds fly south?
Because it's too far to walk!
How do you know flowers are lazy?
You always find them in beds!
Where do frogs hang their coats?
In the croakroom!
What time do you go to the dentist?
At two thirty!!!
Why did the bubble gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken's foot!
Sarah (19) South Africa
What do sick people drink?
What do you call a two-kneed fish?
A twoknee fish!
Why did the music teacher need a ladder?
She couldn't reach the high notes!
What does a cow use to help it swim?
A bottle of milk!
Dean (10 turning 11 in August)
How do turkeys say turquoise?
What do elves bring home from school?
Why do crows never get hit by cars?
Because their buddies warn them -- caw, caw, caw!!
Why did the baby strawberry cry?
Because his parents were in a jam!
Why was their a duck on the train?
Because there was a conducktor on board!
What do you call a bull when it is asleep?
Why couldn't Cinderella play football very well?
Because her coach was a pumpkin!
How do you get a giraffe out of a fridge?
The same way you got it back in!
What pet makes the most noise?
What do you call a flying skunk?
When is a tractor not a tractor?
When it turns into a field!
What is a frogs favourite drink?
What do you get if you cross A sheep and kangaroo?
A wooly jumper!
What kind of ship never breaks?
Why didn't the rooster cross the road?
Because he was too chicken!!
How long is a piece of string?
From one end to the middle times two!!
Sarah (19) South Africa
Five girls went to school with one unbrella. How many got wet??
None, it wasn't raining!
Why didn't the doctor have any patients?
Because he was out of patience!
What do you get when you cross a skunk and a teddy bear?
Winnie the P-U!
There are 4 pigs. One jumped. How many pigs are left?
4! Because a pig just jumped. It didn't jump anywhere!
What age were sausage invented?
Do you want to hear a construction joke?
I'm still working on it!!
What do ducks like to eat with soup?
How do you kiss a hockey player?
This guy was swerving all over the road to get out of the way of pine trees and a cop pulled him over and asked are you drunk?
The man said no I'm trying to get out of the way of these pine trees.
The cop said sir that is your air freshener.
Beth (14) and Holly (9)
Two biscuits were walking down a road. One got run over. What did the other one say?